No, this has nothing to do with that movie starring Jennifer
Aniston and the voice of the parrot in "Paulie".
It's been said that there is no such thing as bad pizza, or
bad sex. Well my friends, we all know
that is absolutely not true. Let's face
it, guys. Some people, and pizzas, just don't fulfill our needs. I'm sure we've all had those drunken nights
with friends that end with a sub-par slice at a seedy pizza shop packed with
the jokers, the smokers and the midnight tokers. So what's one to do in this unsure world of perilous pies?
That's what I am going to find out. And all in a gluten free fashion of course!
Last week, I decided to attempt to make my own gluten free
pizza crust at home so I could enjoy one of my favorites. How hard could pizza dough be, right? It's just some flour, yeast, water and olive
oil. I even had a great head start thanks
to my mom, who gave me this awesome Williams-Sonoma book all about pizzas.
The book has some great recipes for crusts if you are
non-glutarded. I figured I could adapt
them easily into a gluten free version.
I did it with the Pumpkin Pizzelles, so why not with pizza. Well, I was dead wrong...
I followed the "Herb Pizza Crust" recipe to the
letter, only substituting the regular all purpose flour for a gluten-free
version. The first sign of trouble was
the dough barely rose. My ball
of dough, a.k.a "Dough Baby", seemed extremely dense and hard to work
with. I figured Dough Baby would bake
up nicer once it was in the oven.
I
rolled the Dough Baby out into something that resembled a pizza and added the
toppings. I used mushrooms, roasted
tomatoes, spinach, and goat cheese.
Seriously, how bad can it be?
Goat cheese makes everything delicious.
After about 15-20 minutes in the oven, I was blessed with at
beautiful looking pizza with a crust that could dent a car door. Not my proudest moment. The pizza didn't really taste bad, it was
the texture of the crust that was it's downfall.
There will be no recipe posted for this since the result was
a gluten free failure. Think of it as a "what not to do" post. Will I give up? F*ck no! I am determined to come up with the perfect gluten free pizza crust
that glutards and the gluten-tolerant alike will enjoy.
Anyone have any suggestions?
Glutardely Yours,
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